5 Ways to Be Really Popular with the Reformed Crowd

 

In each case, if you have to, at least pretend. I mean, it’s not like you need to be honest, or biblical or anything. Right?

1. Embrace, love and/or promote ‘holy hip-hop’ music. Neglect this one, and you’re history. You may as well be Methodist in West Virginia. It’s the rage in promoting the doctrines of grace, even more so than the expositional preaching of Scripture.

2. In social media, follow only those who the most popular reformed guys are hanging with and following. If you don’t, there’s no way you can RT and propagate the most recent, unbelievably profound truths, as well as keep up with approved events and podcasts, etc.

3. Agree with everything those guys in number 2 are saying, even if you disagree. If you don’t, they’ll get suspicious that your not playing the game, going with the flow, etc., and you’ll fade from the scene like putrid water from an old crop-dusting fuel barrel.

4. If you think any popular reformed guy is unbiblical in any way, don’t say a word. That will only get you blacklisted from ‘the club’. You don’t want that…unless, of course, being in this club is irrelevant and is insulting to your Christian character in the first place. Hey, it could happen.

5. Support and promote anything and everything – publically -  labeled ‘reformed’ or ‘Calvinist’ – even if it’s heresy.

I’ll probably add to this later, but for now, this is a pretty good foundation. If you seek to be popular in the Reformed crowd these days, then good luck my friend, in pimping yourself, selling out the truth in exchange for whatever form of covetousness you desire.

I would say ‘God be with you’ but if you can relate to the above, then, may God have mercy.